While I was in California a couple months ago, my friend Chad suggested that I join them for Johnette's 35th birthday party in Vegas. I replied with while that does sound lovely, this trip I am on right now is going to be it for my vacations this year he said, don't worry about it! I will cash in some frequent flier miles and the rooms are already paid for.
Hot diggity dog! Who passes that up!? NOT ME! So off to Vegas I went! Of course I have no pictures because as you well know: What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas! That's not really why, I just kept forgetting to bring my camera!
While we were there we saw Nick Swardson & Jamie Kennedy (comedians), Chris Rock (comedian) and Spam-a-Lot. I couldn't have imagined a better time! We ate at fabulous restaurants: Daniel Boulud at the Wynn and N9NE at the Palms. I had so much fun! Thank you to everyone: Chad, Danny, Johnette, Donyele, Dave and Curtis for a weekend I'll never forget! xoxo
Friday, November 30, 2007
New Beginning Celebration Photos
Finally I have a little slide show from my New Beginning Celebration back on 10/11. I am so fortunate to have these wonderful women - and so many others who couldn't be there - who love me and have supported me through one of the most challenging experiences of my life.
You may need to click "view show"
Sunday, November 11, 2007
Another one (two) bites the dust...
At one point I was seeing 3 guys. I had been open with all of them - making it clear I wasn't ready for a committed relationship and that I was seeing other people and obviously they should feel free to do the same. I am weeding them out... a rundown:
Massage Boy who I haven't written about yet (it was a new thing) was very taken with me. A little TOO taken with me for the 2 dates we went on. We had talked on the phone and e-mailed for weeks... but it was still early friends stage at the most. The last time we met up he said he wanted to be more than friends and I told him that wasn't a possibility. We decided it would be best if we didn't see each other anymore. In addition to being a massage therapist, he works part-time at the civic center doing security. This past Sunday DD and I went to a Pirates (hockey) game and as luck would have it, Massage Boy was working the section we were sitting in. Here is a transcript of our text message exchange - while AT the game, sitting next to DD:
MB: A picture online with you and a guy hurt. You sitting there all cuddly is killing me. I don't deserve that. I feel sick to my stomach. Thanks for that
A: I'm sorry. I was up front with you and you knew the situation going into "it". It was never my intention to hurt you
MB: Whatever. You know i work here. You could avoid it. My tears weren't fake. I was falling in love with you.
Now I think we are in a "myspace" fight... although not really because I refuse to engage
Then there was Pepaw. I thought about calling him dimples because he has nice ones, but I kept going back to Pepaw. It's a term from my favorite gossip site D Listed and it refers to a hot older man who may or may not be a grandpa... this one happens to be a grandpa... I can't believe I went out with a grandpa! The age thing didn't really bother me - he's 14 years older than I am which isn't a huge deal. He is smart, successful, handsome and polite... as Bartlett would say: he "looks good on paper" but I just wasn't feeling it with him. The last time we went out he went in for a kiss - he got my cheek... he hasn't called since. If he does we'll have to have the "I'm-just-not-that-into-you" talk.
That leaves DD. He is still so sweet and thoughtful. He is patient with me and where I am in my life right now... he's even good with my crazy, in fact he's started calling me his "little crazy cakes" he doesn't know the 1/2 of it... hahaha I am trying to be cautious, use my head as well as my heart, however that is proving to be harder than I thought it would be. I am totally smitten
Massage Boy who I haven't written about yet (it was a new thing) was very taken with me. A little TOO taken with me for the 2 dates we went on. We had talked on the phone and e-mailed for weeks... but it was still early friends stage at the most. The last time we met up he said he wanted to be more than friends and I told him that wasn't a possibility. We decided it would be best if we didn't see each other anymore. In addition to being a massage therapist, he works part-time at the civic center doing security. This past Sunday DD and I went to a Pirates (hockey) game and as luck would have it, Massage Boy was working the section we were sitting in. Here is a transcript of our text message exchange - while AT the game, sitting next to DD:
MB: A picture online with you and a guy hurt. You sitting there all cuddly is killing me. I don't deserve that. I feel sick to my stomach. Thanks for that
A: I'm sorry. I was up front with you and you knew the situation going into "it". It was never my intention to hurt you
MB: Whatever. You know i work here. You could avoid it. My tears weren't fake. I was falling in love with you.
Now I think we are in a "myspace" fight... although not really because I refuse to engage
Then there was Pepaw. I thought about calling him dimples because he has nice ones, but I kept going back to Pepaw. It's a term from my favorite gossip site D Listed and it refers to a hot older man who may or may not be a grandpa... this one happens to be a grandpa... I can't believe I went out with a grandpa! The age thing didn't really bother me - he's 14 years older than I am which isn't a huge deal. He is smart, successful, handsome and polite... as Bartlett would say: he "looks good on paper" but I just wasn't feeling it with him. The last time we went out he went in for a kiss - he got my cheek... he hasn't called since. If he does we'll have to have the "I'm-just-not-that-into-you" talk.
That leaves DD. He is still so sweet and thoughtful. He is patient with me and where I am in my life right now... he's even good with my crazy, in fact he's started calling me his "little crazy cakes" he doesn't know the 1/2 of it... hahaha I am trying to be cautious, use my head as well as my heart, however that is proving to be harder than I thought it would be. I am totally smitten
Monday, November 5, 2007
Whew
"Know that you have to be happy with yourself before you can ever be happy with someone else. And that your value doesn't come through anyone or anything. Your value is because of who you are" ~ Ashley Judd
DD and I had a great dinner on Thursday and talked about what we needed to - well, I talked, he listened and said he would be patient with me. He is divorced (for years now) and remembers what it was liked when it was new. He continues to be a total gentleman never pushing me, just being sweet and thoughtful. Saturday night we went out with my girlfriends (he was the DD); Sunday we went for a motorcycle ride (the last of the season I am sure, it was pretty cold) and watched the Patriots game at a friends house. When I was getting ready to go home Sunday night I had a mini-meltdown... I think it's much to early to let the crazy out, hahaha... then again why wait? He should know what he could potentially be in for. We talked through most of it then I headed home... I am starting to feel like instead of becoming more stable - I am becoming less stable.
Still feeling very discombobulated about my living situation... I feel like I can't stop talking about it. I'm like a homeless person living out of my car. I am so grateful to have so many friends that offer me places to stay until I can be in the house... Perfect example of why I can't live in the same house with Steve: This morning I went home to get ready for the gym. He stayed home sick today and when I came in I woke him up. He came downstairs, and without even thinking about it, went to the bathroom with the door open!? WE AREN'T GIRLFRIENDS! WE AREN'T MARRIED!! WE DON'T EVEN LIVE TOGETHER ANYMORE!! CLOSE THE DAMN DOOR! I was irked. I would really like to think it was because he was sick and very tired... doped up on cold medicine maybe? Ugh... lovely way to start my day.
I have moved on - no longer irked. Steve apologized :) Good wasband.
DD and I had a great dinner on Thursday and talked about what we needed to - well, I talked, he listened and said he would be patient with me. He is divorced (for years now) and remembers what it was liked when it was new. He continues to be a total gentleman never pushing me, just being sweet and thoughtful. Saturday night we went out with my girlfriends (he was the DD); Sunday we went for a motorcycle ride (the last of the season I am sure, it was pretty cold) and watched the Patriots game at a friends house. When I was getting ready to go home Sunday night I had a mini-meltdown... I think it's much to early to let the crazy out, hahaha... then again why wait? He should know what he could potentially be in for. We talked through most of it then I headed home... I am starting to feel like instead of becoming more stable - I am becoming less stable.
Still feeling very discombobulated about my living situation... I feel like I can't stop talking about it. I'm like a homeless person living out of my car. I am so grateful to have so many friends that offer me places to stay until I can be in the house... Perfect example of why I can't live in the same house with Steve: This morning I went home to get ready for the gym. He stayed home sick today and when I came in I woke him up. He came downstairs, and without even thinking about it, went to the bathroom with the door open!? WE AREN'T GIRLFRIENDS! WE AREN'T MARRIED!! WE DON'T EVEN LIVE TOGETHER ANYMORE!! CLOSE THE DAMN DOOR! I was irked. I would really like to think it was because he was sick and very tired... doped up on cold medicine maybe? Ugh... lovely way to start my day.
I have moved on - no longer irked. Steve apologized :) Good wasband.
Thursday, November 1, 2007
New Favorite
That is a song by Allison Krauss that I love.
I am referring to DD. I can't remember the last time I felt this conflicted.
I need to start by offering the disclaimer: I know I am not emotionally ready to be in a relationship... I know I have only been divorced for weeks... only been separated for 7 months... with the same man for 10 years. I have been dating a lot, meeting lots of guys, some of them really nice and fun to be with... Then along comes this one.
Never before has someone been so sweet to me or been so clear and up front about how interested they are in me. I won't lie, it's flattering! Who doesn't want to hear how wonderful they are? I like how he will give me kisses on my forehead in front of his mother and friends. He sends me text messages telling me he misses me when he can't see me... telling me how lucky he is to know me. I've never had a guy say that stuff to me or be so happy to be with me. I like that he listens when I talk. That he is willing to go out with 5 of my girlfriends that he hasn't met because it's what I wanted to do and he wanted to be with me.
All that said, it feels like it is happening too fast... we have seen each other 13 out of the last 15 days! Tonight we are having dinner and I have to tell him that we need to slow down - A LOT... and I am dreading it. I don't want to hurt his feelings and I don't want to push him away... I also want to make sure I am not using him as a rebound. That we are building a solid friendship as a base for something more down the road if we go that route... The time we are spending together reminds me a lot of how Steve and I started - hot, heavy and FAST... I don't want a repeat of that... (no offense, Wasband). I really like this guy... I just need to make sure I am not getting carried away.
I am referring to DD. I can't remember the last time I felt this conflicted.
I need to start by offering the disclaimer: I know I am not emotionally ready to be in a relationship... I know I have only been divorced for weeks... only been separated for 7 months... with the same man for 10 years. I have been dating a lot, meeting lots of guys, some of them really nice and fun to be with... Then along comes this one.
Never before has someone been so sweet to me or been so clear and up front about how interested they are in me. I won't lie, it's flattering! Who doesn't want to hear how wonderful they are? I like how he will give me kisses on my forehead in front of his mother and friends. He sends me text messages telling me he misses me when he can't see me... telling me how lucky he is to know me. I've never had a guy say that stuff to me or be so happy to be with me. I like that he listens when I talk. That he is willing to go out with 5 of my girlfriends that he hasn't met because it's what I wanted to do and he wanted to be with me.
All that said, it feels like it is happening too fast... we have seen each other 13 out of the last 15 days! Tonight we are having dinner and I have to tell him that we need to slow down - A LOT... and I am dreading it. I don't want to hurt his feelings and I don't want to push him away... I also want to make sure I am not using him as a rebound. That we are building a solid friendship as a base for something more down the road if we go that route... The time we are spending together reminds me a lot of how Steve and I started - hot, heavy and FAST... I don't want a repeat of that... (no offense, Wasband). I really like this guy... I just need to make sure I am not getting carried away.
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