Whew

"Know that you have to be happy with yourself before you can ever be happy with someone else. And that your value doesn't come through anyone or anything. Your value is because of who you are" ~ Ashley Judd


DD and I had a great dinner on Thursday and talked about what we needed to - well, I talked, he listened and said he would be patient with me. He is divorced (for years now) and remembers what it was liked when it was new. He continues to be a total gentleman never pushing me, just being sweet and thoughtful. Saturday night we went out with my girlfriends (he was the DD); Sunday we went for a motorcycle ride (the last of the season I am sure, it was pretty cold) and watched the Patriots game at a friends house. When I was getting ready to go home Sunday night I had a mini-meltdown... I think it's much to early to let the crazy out, hahaha... then again why wait? He should know what he could potentially be in for. We talked through most of it then I headed home... I am starting to feel like instead of becoming more stable - I am becoming less stable.

Still feeling very discombobulated about my living situation... I feel like I can't stop talking about it. I'm like a homeless person living out of my car. I am so grateful to have so many friends that offer me places to stay until I can be in the house... Perfect example of why I can't live in the same house with Steve: This morning I went home to get ready for the gym. He stayed home sick today and when I came in I woke him up. He came downstairs, and without even thinking about it, went to the bathroom with the door open!? WE AREN'T GIRLFRIENDS! WE AREN'T MARRIED!! WE DON'T EVEN LIVE TOGETHER ANYMORE!! CLOSE THE DAMN DOOR! I was irked. I would really like to think it was because he was sick and very tired... doped up on cold medicine maybe? Ugh... lovely way to start my day.

I have moved on - no longer irked. Steve apologized :) Good wasband.